all I ever wanted each day was just to see you smile
monkeys rabid winged nuts … ripped me open just to grab my straw guts … they left my insides all over this yellow road … every Princess frog leapt from me croaking in toad
out of the clear blue sky sun a spinning house almost on me fell … from inside the crash landing stepped out a girl that once remembered me well … the ruby clicks of her freshly stolen nordstrom witch high heels … stepped up to the plate just to show me how real love should feel
I met her where we both worked making software frames … playing for keeps social vacuum fish bowl games … while she introduced herself to all the elves in cobbling support … I lost all sense of listening when she began to give us a short and light selfie report
everything around her and behind turned to tv static grey … I forgot that I had nothing good or funny to say … thinking that she loved who she was with at that moment for all time … not even in my wildest west dreams i ever thought to let her into mine
an eastern witch just finished making me into tin … I always had to be oiled or I would rust before the day begins … with chopstick precision she removed from my tin chest my on-loan second heart … in only three months of wedding a separation was filed before it could get a jump-start
never was a divorce so perfectly timed and planned … I let her take me for a fool and a platinum rubber band … she kept all the presents from both family sides demanding money, wedding bill payment with no place to sleep or letting me take a shower … after not being a wife for only two thousand hours … the dragon lady judiciously filed for the separation she had legally planned for years … lawyers on both sides laughed at me until they cried in tears
she owned a cat that gave my underarms and inner thighs puss-filled, prone-to-leaking blisters … she then took home her moms flea bag of nineteen years then stole another cat from her sister … by turning her future-ex-husband into Clown of the Stupid made of tin … brilliant in strategic execution divorcing her wheezer drunk who’ll never again scare her guests skin that bubbles in fester
she ate my second heart to make room for a clock to install … the clicking in my chest would take a licking warning cats The Tin Man Clown is about to call
no courage or Toto could help enough a cowardly king … even now I can’t believe how I got fleeced without defending a thing … I chose to live in whatever vehicle i could hope to register and find … the dragon lady drained me of all her money, my stepped-on heart and long-lost mind
after lethargic attempts at career poison, asylum-bound depression … parking cold trucks near germ-infested bathrooms sending me into professional regression …
I found me making my own breaks into the field I trained by mine own choice … without pretend fear or guilty inner voice
i thought the job i got writing for a vendor of CCTV cameras could not get me closer to feeling 7 feet tall … but when I heard in the wind that a computer vendor in Austin Texas was about to make me a call
it was only me that fixed me
now no one will ever get in my godam way
after all I went thru no one will ever stop me again
never again
never again
never again
there is no one left I know enough to stop me anymore
only I could ever stop me like I did before
no one I know now even comes to my front door
no one I know will ever stop me from my future ever again
no one. ever again.
no one again
only someone who I love enough to dictate my fate again
there is no one left who I could love that much again
never.
again.
I will never let love ever stop me from success ever again.
I have come so far. I have learned so much . . . .
.
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